THE CHURCH OF COOL Latest Headlines

Friday, August 31, 2007

JAMES BROWN DANCE LESSON!!! Dopest thing you've ever seen!!!

The Church has forsaken you for far too long this week, so we are here to bless you with a jewel from the vault - check James Brown giving out dance lessons!!! The dopest sh#t you've ever seen in your life!! Now go and do the mashpotato!!! Holla......

How The Church makes it RAIN, too!!!

Damon Armagost, of Smryna, pleaded guilty Friday to printing $1,400 in counterfeit bills from the image of $100 bill he downloaded on his computer to pay strippers at a club in Nashville, The (Nashville) Tennessean reported.

Armagost spent $600 in counterfeit money in April on strippers who became suspicious and called police, who recognized the counterfeit bills as all having the same number as fake money passed elsewhere in the country, the newspaper reported.

AIDS victims "buried alive!!" WTF!!!


An HIV-positive woman named Margaret Marabe in Papua New Guinea claims that she has witnessed people with HIV/AIDS buried by relatives who were frightened and could not care for them any longer!! WTF!! The alcoholics and drug addicts are next, followed by the general black sheeps of the family. Loud infants too......f#ckin backwards ass low-lives......

Kinda looks like irradescent sperm to The Church.....


Astonomers voted, and here it is, the Top Ten Most Amazing Pictures Taken by the Hubble Space Telescope in the Last 16 Years!! All of them are trippy, and some just conjure up other thoughts, but overall dopeness from a telescope I've been hearing about for years. Or are these just computer generated photos to once again convince me that "space" really exists......hmmmm.......

50 Tips for Frugal Living - Bless yourself!!


Yeah, we've heard it all before, live frugal because it allows you to spend less than you earn, and then you can use the difference to pay off debt, save or invest. Because the less you spend, the less you need to earn. And that means you can work less, or work more but retire early. Or take mini retirements. You just have more options with a frugal lifestyle. So no drug and booze budget? What fun is that? Check it....

Party like a Jihadi!! Sure dude, blame the music!!

Asharq al-Awsat interviews three would-be “foreign fighters” under arrest in Riyadh who made big plans to join the insurgency. One of the young men says it was the music that made him do it:

"However, his admiration of the voice and words of an Islamic Jihadi singer and his call to participate in the insurgency pushed him to do what he did.

Al-Quayri told Asharq al-Awsat that he distributed documentaries about Jihad in Iraq after finding inspiration in the words of the unknown Islamic singer who Al-Quayri now feels deceived him by saying that Jihad is the least he could do for Muslims in such a chaotic country."

Stare-down a rugby player from your home!!


Archiblad Ingall Stretton in London built an advergame for the O2 mobile provider that puts you in a staring contest with three rugby players. The best part is that the game is able to tell when you blink or look away: "We capture the output of the webcam using BitmapData, using the current and previous frames of data we apply a Difference filter to the two images and then we analyse, pixel by pixel, what has changed." Dope.....check it.......

Extinct Walrus Penis Bone goes for $8,000!!! I'm in the wrong business....

On my birthday no less!! A fossilized penis bone from an extinct walrus got auctioned off for $8,000, far below the expected price. The 4½-foot-long "item," covered with weathered skin and dry muscle tissue, was sold to the company that runs the Ripley's Believe It or Not museums, said Josh Chait, director of operations for the I.M. Chait Gallery, his family's auction house.

"Their corporate office bought it and they'll probably display it around the country," he said. The fossilized baculum, or penis bone, is from a species of walrus that went extinct 12,000 years ago. It was found preserved in permafrost in northern Siberia.

The auction house said it was believed to be the largest known mammal penis fossil (Wait till The Church dies.....couldn't help it.....).

"I'm glad it's going to a museum and not a private collection" so it can on public display, Chait said. "It's definitely something everyone should see once in their life."

I can't make this sh#t up.......God I love being alive........

Dope Sh#t - The Pillow-Wig!!!

Needless to say, ours is in the mail, but could you imagine if this became as common as Nikes? I bet you we wouldn't be so mad all the time, all this war and sh#t......anyway, I bet you we wouldn't be so mad all the time, all this war and sh#t......anyway, "Pillowig" is a handmade wearable pillow comforting people's daily lives, enabling users to sleep comfortably whenever and whenever they’d like. When user test were done in public spaces - subway, airplane, library, class room and laundromat, viewers commented: “I would like to have it for my trip.”, “Very funny.” “This is practical, but a laugh, too." Joo Youn Paek made 50 limited editions and sold 47 pieces at the exhibition of the work and gained “Pillowig” fans. Two months later fans did a group performance piece at the Old Palace, Seoul. Dope......check it......

War Scholar Draws out Attack Plan for Iran - great....

Ah the war mongering continues......I wouldn't even be that mad if it was well considered, but British scholar, arms expert and Director of the Center for International Studies and Diplomacy, Dr. Dan Plesch says, "We wrote the report partly as we were surprised that this sort of quite elementary analysis had not been produced by the many well resourced Institutes in the United States."

Uh, can you say awesome, that the country we won our freedom from is now drawing up the war plans that we just sort of pushed to the bottom of the G.W.'s Honey-do list? The plan is "what the military option might involve if it were picked up off the table and put into action," which is hella cool to find in theory, not so cool in practice. Check the paper, "Considering a war with Iran: A discussion paper on WMD in the Middle East."