For those that thought The Church went soft.....
Some Mamie Van Doren fo' dat azz......yeah we threw up in our mouth, just a little......
THE CHURCH OF COOL Latest Headlines
Monday, November 26, 2007
Friday, November 16, 2007
Monday, November 12, 2007
We'rrrreeeee BAACCCKKKK!!! - What you know about Sharon Jones & the Dap Kings, huh?
Funkiest isht this year (and last really), take a hold of the soul my brothers and sisters, The Church presents our newest affliction - SHARON JONES & THE DAP KINGS!!!
Friday, August 31, 2007
JAMES BROWN DANCE LESSON!!! Dopest thing you've ever seen!!!
The Church has forsaken you for far too long this week, so we are here to bless you with a jewel from the vault - check James Brown giving out dance lessons!!! The dopest sh#t you've ever seen in your life!! Now go and do the mashpotato!!! Holla......
How The Church makes it RAIN, too!!!
Damon Armagost, of Smryna, pleaded guilty Friday to printing $1,400 in counterfeit bills from the image of $100 bill he downloaded on his computer to pay strippers at a club in Nashville, The (Nashville) Tennessean reported.
Armagost spent $600 in counterfeit money in April on strippers who became suspicious and called police, who recognized the counterfeit bills as all having the same number as fake money passed elsewhere in the country, the newspaper reported.
AIDS victims "buried alive!!" WTF!!!
An HIV-positive woman named Margaret Marabe in Papua New Guinea claims that she has witnessed people with HIV/AIDS buried by relatives who were frightened and could not care for them any longer!! WTF!! The alcoholics and drug addicts are next, followed by the general black sheeps of the family. Loud infants too......f#ckin backwards ass low-lives......
Kinda looks like irradescent sperm to The Church.....
Astonomers voted, and here it is, the Top Ten Most Amazing Pictures Taken by the Hubble Space Telescope in the Last 16 Years!! All of them are trippy, and some just conjure up other thoughts, but overall dopeness from a telescope I've been hearing about for years. Or are these just computer generated photos to once again convince me that "space" really exists......hmmmm.......
50 Tips for Frugal Living - Bless yourself!!
Yeah, we've heard it all before, live frugal because it allows you to spend less than you earn, and then you can use the difference to pay off debt, save or invest. Because the less you spend, the less you need to earn. And that means you can work less, or work more but retire early. Or take mini retirements. You just have more options with a frugal lifestyle. So no drug and booze budget? What fun is that? Check it....
Party like a Jihadi!! Sure dude, blame the music!!
Asharq al-Awsat interviews three would-be “foreign fighters” under arrest in Riyadh who made big plans to join the insurgency. One of the young men says it was the music that made him do it:
"However, his admiration of the voice and words of an Islamic Jihadi singer and his call to participate in the insurgency pushed him to do what he did.
Al-Quayri told Asharq al-Awsat that he distributed documentaries about Jihad in Iraq after finding inspiration in the words of the unknown Islamic singer who Al-Quayri now feels deceived him by saying that Jihad is the least he could do for Muslims in such a chaotic country."
Stare-down a rugby player from your home!!
Archiblad Ingall Stretton in London built an advergame for the O2 mobile provider that puts you in a staring contest with three rugby players. The best part is that the game is able to tell when you blink or look away: "We capture the output of the webcam using BitmapData, using the current and previous frames of data we apply a Difference filter to the two images and then we analyse, pixel by pixel, what has changed." Dope.....check it.......
Extinct Walrus Penis Bone goes for $8,000!!! I'm in the wrong business....
On my birthday no less!! A fossilized penis bone from an extinct walrus got auctioned off for $8,000, far below the expected price. The 4½-foot-long "item," covered with weathered skin and dry muscle tissue, was sold to the company that runs the Ripley's Believe It or Not museums, said Josh Chait, director of operations for the I.M. Chait Gallery, his family's auction house.
"Their corporate office bought it and they'll probably display it around the country," he said. The fossilized baculum, or penis bone, is from a species of walrus that went extinct 12,000 years ago. It was found preserved in permafrost in northern Siberia.
The auction house said it was believed to be the largest known mammal penis fossil (Wait till The Church dies.....couldn't help it.....).
"I'm glad it's going to a museum and not a private collection" so it can on public display, Chait said. "It's definitely something everyone should see once in their life."
Dope Sh#t - The Pillow-Wig!!!
Needless to say, ours is in the mail, but could you imagine if this became as common as Nikes? I bet you we wouldn't be so mad all the time, all this war and sh#t......anyway, I bet you we wouldn't be so mad all the time, all this war and sh#t......anyway, "Pillowig" is a handmade wearable pillow comforting people's daily lives, enabling users to sleep comfortably whenever and whenever they’d like. When user test were done in public spaces - subway, airplane, library, class room and laundromat, viewers commented: “I would like to have it for my trip.”, “Very funny.” “This is practical, but a laugh, too." Joo Youn Paek made 50 limited editions and sold 47 pieces at the exhibition of the work and gained “Pillowig” fans. Two months later fans did a group performance piece at the Old Palace, Seoul. Dope......check it......
War Scholar Draws out Attack Plan for Iran - great....
Ah the war mongering continues......I wouldn't even be that mad if it was well considered, but British scholar, arms expert and Director of the Center for International Studies and Diplomacy, Dr. Dan Plesch says, "We wrote the report partly as we were surprised that this sort of quite elementary analysis had not been produced by the many well resourced Institutes in the United States."
Uh, can you say awesome, that the country we won our freedom from is now drawing up the war plans that we just sort of pushed to the bottom of the G.W.'s Honey-do list? The plan is "what the military option might involve if it were picked up off the table and put into action," which is hella cool to find in theory, not so cool in practice. Check the paper, "Considering a war with Iran: A discussion paper on WMD in the Middle East."
Thursday, August 23, 2007
Osama, Sadam; Iraq, Iran - tomatoe, toemato...whatever!!
I am not a big fan of caps but -
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DON'T TELL ME YOUR GOING TO FALL FOR THIS SH#T AGAIN!! CHECK THE COMPARISON OF THE RUN-UP TO WAR WITH IRAQ AND WHAT'S GOING ON WITH FOX NEWS THESE DAYS IN COVERING IRAN (below)!!! SOMEBODY PLEASE DO SOMETHING!!!
I would but I've got Wii to play.......f#ck.......
Simian Drugs - Why I left advertising!!!
Because I could never come up with something this f#cking good!!! Check it......
Gays overdosing on GHB at crazy rate this summer!!
The industrial and household solvent based party drug GHB has sure been kicking the gay community's ass this summer!! There have been a record number of deaths by overdose at the circuit parties like the annual Pines Party and Fire Island in New York, so much so that there was even a bulletin put out by the Board of Directors at Pines Care Centers:
We regret to inform the Fire Island Pines Community that there was a death this morning, Saturday, August 18, 2007, of a 31 year old healthy man from a reaction to GHB.
This tragic incident follows an unprecedented number of GHB overdoses at the Pines Party, July 29.
Putting this together there is a strong likelihood that the GHB being distributed in the community is particularly toxic and dangerous.
We circulate this information to encourage all Pines and Grove residents to stay away from any GHB.
Of course it is better not to take any illegal drugs as there are no known ways to reverse their side effects. But all the overdoses we have seen in the last four weeks have included GHB.
Sincerely,
Dr. Ed Schulhafer, M.D.
President
Board of Directors
Pines Care Center, Inc.
Party hard boys and girls, but not so hard that we don't see you at the next one.......damn......
Anyone remember "American Gladiators?"
Well word is that they are updating it for a new run on NBC!!! If they bring Nitro back I'm gonna sh#t!! Check some of the old school buttas.......
AMERICAN GLADIATOR INTRO
FEMALE POWERBALL!!
Dope Sh#t - Buddha Apparel Transformers Tee's
Keeping the Transformers real gully, Buddha Apparel launches some new t's featuring bandanna sporting Autobots and Decipticons. Each shirt comes in black, as well as other design exclusive colors. Dope......
It's baaaccckkkk......Church religion "Heroes" is coming in less than a month!!
Check the new trailer.....
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Simian Drugs - Lovin the Blue-footed Booby!!
Doesn't get much flyer than the Blue-footed Booby!! Not only is its' feet steeped in the dopest electric baby-blue and lives on the very fly Galapagos Islands, but its also named after the Spanish term "bobo," which means "slow or stupid fellow" because of its clumsiness on land. The best part - when it is "courting" the ladies, Bobo shows off his fly blue feet and dances to impress the lucky lady. During the dance, the male spreads his wings and stomps his feet to show his love.....dope......here's more about the Booby!!
Dope Sh#t - Lupe Fiasco's "The Cool" T-shirts!!
Named after Lupe Fiasco’s upcoming sophomore album, “The Cool," New Jersey sneaker spot Straight Laced hooked up some limited edition t-shirts for the release, available now!! Nice....
Ah, those crazy Asians and their game shows!!
Not sure WTF this is but we like it!! Skribe and I have a "standing" bet on who could last the longest - what do you think? Check it:
The Determination Of The Test - video powered by Metacafe
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Karl Rove. Father. Gold Cock Ring - nuff said!!
So there on the floor in his library, amid teaching videos on piercings and piles of [Piercing Fans International Quarterly], I listened to one man’s account of his travels through the Los Angeles piercing community in the 70’s and 80’s — the "piercing parties" with folks getting pierced on coffee tables in private homes, nurses that helped, and a guy named Jim. I knew about Jim. I had both my nipples pierced at The Gauntlet. Louie also knew about play piercings; I wanted to learn and so he taught me. And so between splashing in the pool, brunches, visiting his volunteer list of AIDS patients, eating at all numbers of restaurants, visiting friends who lived around the area, birding at the Salton Sea and eating TV dinners, we explored needles and the effect they have on you. During the day I was told the names of piercings ... I hated the words but I wanted to know about each kind. To this day I’ve never gotten dydoe because Louie told me it was a hard heal. I never copied Louie’s piercings but I never got them out of my mind. Some years after I last saw him, I found another friend, a professional piercer name Sque3z who took me on another journey recounted on BME. Louie would be proud.
This story almost makes all this G.W. shite worth it!! So according to an essay on BME Zine, Louis Claude Rove Jr., adopted father of Karl Rove, "was not only gay, but a part of the early body piercing scene and a regular at 70s piercing parties... There are pictures of him on BME," according to founder of BME Shannon Larratt. Below is an excerpt:
Louie loved his piercings, they made him smile. People who are pierced will understand.
Spin that one to the conservative Right Karlie boy, your dad was one of us!! Damn, I'm gonna sleep good tonite.........
WTF!! - Bling your Ipod out.....whatever......
This is just ostentatious and ridiculous, but we wanted to share anyway......f#ck whoever owns this......
WTF - Aussie woman killed by camel (uh, no bullsh#t!!)
A 60-year old woman in Australia was knocked to the ground, stomped on and then sat on by her PET camel!! WTF!!! Worst part - her husband found her hours later when he returned from feeding his pet livestock.......
Dope Sh#t - What really happens in a FREESTYLE BATTLE!!
Check this dope video for the Rhyme Spitters Finale with special effects - real real dope concept!!!
rhyme spitters rap battle: juice vs knuckles - Watch more free videos
Amy Winehouse needs rehab for being a freak!!
An ex-lover of Amy Winehouse says baby girl definitely needs rehab - but not for drugs and booze, but for being a hot fox when it come to knicker-poppin!! God, this makes me want to go listen to her music more, but I hope she gets it together so that we get more crazy stories like this!!
So....if Iraq was a "quagmire" in '94, then what changed now....
What I don't get is that these guys are still in office? Did anyone have this footage 5 years ago? Sheez.....
Monday, August 20, 2007
Michael Vick Doggie Obedience Academy!!! This is so wrong.....
This is in poor taste, even for us, but f#ck it, Ron Mexico announced he was pleading guilty today, so its appropriate. Here's the final boo-hoo for Mike Vick #7, aka, Ron Mexico.......asshole......damn, never thought I'd be saying that about Mike Vick.......
Want to trip? Google "Cathie Jung" - not our fault!!
So a model friend of mine sent me this message:
If you're brave, Google "Cathie Jung", look at the images, and tell me what you think on my comment space. I will warn you, these images are... not what you would expect to see in the twenty-first century, but they are at least educational. If you have a weak stomach, I can't be responsible for what happens....
We did, and this pictures are real.....and we threw up in our mouth!! Check them all.......what do you think?
New TALIB KWELI video - Hot Thing/In the Mood!!! Dope!!!
Although it rips off those cool ass HP computer ads, still pretty dope!! Also, why does Kweli constantly go with the psuedo-love & party songs? It hasn't worked (check the sales numbers), so why not go back to what you do best - being a lyrical creature!! But whatever, still diggin' this track......
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
